Wait...Where is my change?

Someone tell me where all my, so called, anger is? I thought the amount that I had was overwhelming. Maybe I have gotten over what I would call, "Teenage Angst". I mean, at least I've never attempted suicide. There is a first time for everything, and there is a last time for everything. Somewhere in the middle, I sit there alone, along the lines of "lack of trying or lack of motivation?".

Does anyone have a good reason for me to try though? I long to be open minded, so that means I must try EVERYTHING. After popping enough pills to slaughter a horse, it should prove a mind altering experience. I bet my views of reality would be forever changed. I suppose it would shatter my world into bits, and then I would have to label myself as emo/scene/goth.

So many people have tried, and survived these "final" attempts. It leads me to believe it is probably 100% safe. Hell, after waking from a coma, all my friends and family would be there. Along with some charges from a man in blue. Then I would be the center of the show, when my attempt fails. Pity, and concern is just a preemptive to a second attempt. When all that attention dissipates, I would probably feel longing. I mean, I am an attention whore after all.

It is times like these that truly exonerates a person of all their duties. Making you feel free as a bird, and allows you to put your doubts and cares all inside of a little bubble. Haha Bubbles are funny. I love using the bubble metaphor, especially because of the irony. You would think that all that soap would help clean all the doubts up. Nope, if anything, repression is the worst possible situation. One day everyone will realize this and change accordingly. I suppose change is too easy or too difficult to ask for though isn't it. Just ask Obama.

All I know is, if I didn't get my change after purchasing a pack of gum with a $20, I would be pissed. Deep inside, you know that the cashier is pocketing the remaining $19.70. These are the thoughts of every pissed off American.

So...I really don't know. I think all this positive feedback is going to my head. Regardless, it still remains like a deflating Macy's parade balloon. I wonder how much helium could fit before it explodes? So, like usual, I make my statement at the end. Wow, that is so "like" me isn't it?

If you don't attain that craved attention, repetition always seems the best option for society. Learning from your mistakes is so first grade... Ha ha, oh yeah, no one pays attention to education. If you don't make mistakes, then what errors do you have to change?